The Storm Will Pass. The Spring Will Come.

* taps the mike* Is this thing still on? I’m still here, kinda-sorta.

BigTroubles

I needed to take a break. It’s no secret that these past few months have been tough for me mentally. Finding the words and trying to keep everything light when I was feeling pretty dark was too hard and seemed like a lie so I took a step back from social media for a few weeks. No one wanted to hear me whine and moan about how fucked up I was feeling, most of all me.

exhausted

Exhausted from pretending everything is OK

Things are better, I am better. Spring is coming and there are little lambs ready to be born soon.

lambs

Gotta love a little lamb face

Loneliness, isolation (self-imposed) and a bucket full of other issues topped off with a dollop of pressure put upon myself for the ATB race. Every day I stressed over my lack of running, the stress would lead to me beating myself up mentally, I’d feel like shit, tell myself I sucked and blow off another run. Napping became my new hobby because it is easier to hide under the covers then to face what is really going on. It was a vicious merry-go-round that I just couldn’t seem to get off. Mid-February I gave myself permission to find some joy and NOT run the race and hopped off of the merry-go-round.

Last week I sold my Around the Bay Road Race 30k bib. It felt good. I feel good. Scratch that, I feel great.

BeginToday

 

I’m running again, training for the Ottawa Race Weekend half marathon but this time I am following a new training plan that has me running 4-5 days a week instead of 6 days a week. I’m no longer burnt out and want to run instead of feeling like I have to run. I’m noticing a difference with my speed already and my last 10k LSR time was 3 seconds slower than my 10k race time in November. That on its own makes me want to keep going. And the sunshine, the longer days, the sometimes warmer weather.

SpringWillCome

The Spring Will Come

I can’t promise I will be back to posting regularly any time soon, one small step at a time, but I will be here and reading/commenting on your blogs once again. One thing is for sure, I have missed all of my Blogland friends and I’m looking forward to catching up with all of you.

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What have you been up to over the past few weeks? Fill me in, I want to hear all about it.

 

Meet Anita


I am a wife to a retired Army Captain and present day shepherd, a mother to two Big's (20 & 19) and one Little (6) and new to running at the age of 42. I am hopelessly addicted to Starbucks Peppermint Mocha's. My family thinks I am crazy. The voices in my head say they may be right.

9 Thoughts on “The Storm Will Pass. The Spring Will Come.

  1. Melodie on March 6, 2014 at 10:36 am said:

    So nice to see you back and being your true, honest self. That is what we love about reading your thoughts. I also have not run since I went to NB and I think it is time to get back at it. When I am ready for it to not be pressure.
    Spring will come, soon I hope.
    Love you, miss you! So proud of you!

  2. Sometimes you just need to take a break and step back. It sounds like you made the right call by selling your ATB bib. Running shouldn’t feel like a chore so I’m glad you are finding the joy in it now!

    Aw, the picture of the lamb!!! How cute! Fingers crossed for spring!
    Leana recently posted…Tuesday Night Spins Are KillerMy Profile

  3. Glad you are taking a break and finding your happy ! :-)

    Started a new medication to help with my ovulation, did another half marathon in Disney, got a stress fracture, hmm.. I have been a hermit just waiting for my hubby to come home. lol
    Ashley recently posted…Remember that one time…My Profile

  4. Anita, I have always loved you for being you <3 Your honesty is so refreshing! Glad to see your spirits are picking up and you are coming out of your winter coma. xo
    Hollie recently posted…Could You Stand To Try This Lower Body Circuit?My Profile

  5. I think it’s been a hard winter for us all. Some times we just need to take time to reset. So good to hear that you are getting back out there again though.
    Theresa C. recently posted…Tuesday Link UpMy Profile

  6. Hey … glad you’re taking some time and taking a deep breath. Take care of yourself.
    Crystal recently posted…Saturday’s Epic Run Brought To You By …..My Profile

  7. I’m so glad you are taking the time you need, but I have missed your posts and it was so good to come here and see a new post again! You do what is right for you and we will be waiting!! :)
    Sara @ lifebetweenthemiles recently posted…Boston Marathon Training: Week 10 UpdateMy Profile

  8. I have missed you. It sounds like you have done some very good things for yourself and that’s awesome! I hope that spring hurries up for all of us and please share pics of the lambs!!! I want to cuddle that face!

    Many hugs, friend. Your blog friends are here when you get back! xo
    Lauren recently posted…I’m FREE!! And I have winners!My Profile

  9. I’m glad you took the pressure off yourself and sold your bib. I think it’s much better to modify your goals than to have a horrible experience. I changed from a 6 day training schedule to a 4 day one as well. I felt the same way, I started enjoying running more and felt less guilty all the time from missing training days. I’ll miss meeting you at the ATB, but I hope you really enjoy your Ottawa Half Marathon.
    Jackie recently posted…21k and some Wild TurkeysMy Profile

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